Creative Brooding

Welcome to my blog. My name is Pat O'Connor and I wanted to create one little spot where I could share feelings, thoughts, even ramble if I want to. Perhaps too, reveal a side of me very few know about. If there are two words I would use to describe myself, those two would be iconoclastic and eclectic.

Thursday, October 13, 2005

The Tomorrows Are All Gone


The Tomorrows Are All Gone

Wednesday, September 3, 2003

I remember when we met, on that chilly and wet October morning in 1973. We were so young, only 18.. and life was full of hope and reverberated with joyous expectations.


You soon captured my heart with the beauty of your smile, the softness of your heart... the life in your eyes. How I loved to be lost in your eyes and to explore the secrets of your soul.

But even then, the demons lurked... like evil shadows crouching in dark corners. Why could I not see them? Did I even want to?

Spring and Summer came and our spirits intertwined in a celebration of life itself. The Autumn we spent wandering hand in hand thru the Alps..... how can it be... that it really happened... such ancient of days long ago in a forgotten lifetime.

The years blended into decades with monotonous regularity.... and then who you were died. Like a flower consumed in the heat you faded into oblivion.... and the demons came and the fog settled over your spirit..... and there were no more tomorrows.
Who you were died...... and I wonder how much beauty was forever lost when you died...how much joy was left unfulfilled ... how many promises of hope lie buried in a graveyard of emptiness.

And I couldn't even save you..... the more we run from our demons, the more we become their prisoner. To be free from our pain, we must embrace it and allow it to sculpture our spirit,,, to create beauty.... other wise it will consume our souls.... and no one can save you.

I couldn't even give you the bouquet of forgiveness... how I wanted to set it at your doorstep.... but the petals would have withered and fallen in a crumpled pile.

Now, you have woven your own reality.... hidden away in your home (your car)..with you only companions a cellphone and a lap top. You are safe, even from those who love and care.

How I mourn for who you were... how my heart weeps because of the fog that covers your soul......am I one of those who can only love once? "If I give my heart.... it will be forever.... or I'll never fall in love".... but there are no more tomorrows.

Only the sorrows of today and the memories of a forsaken yesterday.
artwork: Web Musem

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